My daughter, Elizabeth, has been visiting colleges lately to help her decide where she should go for her degree.  I don’t always get much time to spend with her, as she does not live with me.  I am divorced and remarried, and she lives with her mother.  So when we talk, a lot of times it is in a car travelling to and fro. 

Elizabeth has some very clear ideas on how her life will go once she gets her bachelor’s degree.  I won’t detail that here, as it is not relevant to my topic.  But suffice to say, she is very idealistic.  She wants to make the very BEST decision in choosing the right college/university for herself.  I support her in that endeavor.  Earlier today, I took her to one of the local universities for a visit.  Next week, I will be taking her to another university.  Sometimes, though, as her father, I feel the need to give her some advice regarding the future.  What she does with it is up to her, but I feel that it is my responsibility to at least tell her my thoughts.

On one of our trips in the car, I was listening to her ideas about what she wants to do for a living.  I was once a school band teacher, and she also wants to pursue music.  She seemed concerned about all of the details of her plans working out, and was hopeful that she could get her ideal job right out of college.  I commented during the conversation. 

“Elizabeth, let me tell you something that I’ve learned in life.  Your success in life will largely be determined by 1 thing.  Yes, there will be many areas that need to come into place, but this one thing will LARGELY determine your success in life.  And that thing is…”

What would you tell her?

“….your ability to manage people.”

You see, whatever you do in life, whether you are a mechanic, a teacher, a salesperson, a construction worker, a truck driver, whether you stock shelves or pick up trash or work in government or WHATEVER you do, your success in life is LARGELY determined by your ability to influence and manage people.

Think about it.  Everything you want in life is presently owned or controlled by someone else.  Doesn’t it make sense to spend some time figuring out how to get it?  If you will take the time to learn, as Dale Carnegie put it, how to win friends and influence people, you will have mastered the #1 key to success in life. 

Yes, you need to be skilled in your chosen line of work.  Yes, you may need training, or a college degree, or even a Ph.D. to be able to “do” your chosen profession.  But if you are not good with people, your success in life will be limited.  The most successful people in the world tend to be those who manage people well.   

I know my daughter reads my blog.  I remember one time she came to me and said something like, “Dad.  I read your blog.  Wow!  I didn’t know you were so….intellectual!”  Spoken as a true teenager.  So, Elizabeth, just remember:  People are more important than things.  Yes, learn your profession well.  Get your degree.  But make sure you take some time to learn how to win friends and influence people, and you will go far.

More next time,

Tim

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